I’m going to stray off topic for one post because tonight was a good night and I thought I would share a little bit of it. Tonight I went to the Embassy, it’s the University of Waterloo church. I think it’s one of my favourite churches in Ontario that I’ve been to. Anyway, Brandon, the senior pastor, spoke about busyness and slowing down. It really made me think.
My entire life has been busy. God has blessed me with a number of gifts in a number of different areas and at any given point in time I find myself up to my neck in activities. Whether it be on worship teams, leadership teams, writing, designing, speaking or mentoring, I’m always doing so much. Let me be a little bit honest and transparent with you. At times, I pride myself in my calendar. It’s all colour coded and it’s usually full on everyday. It makes me feel good when I know that I’m using up every single breath of time. I don’t know why this is, I don’t know why I like to fill up everyday with something to do.
It’s odd, most things I do are productive, I don’t usually just fill up my time with things simply for the sake of filling up time. I get lots done, and I’m happy with what I’m doing, but sometimes I feel like I’m missing the point. Tonight really emphasized that for me. First I take way too much pride in what I do. I’m quite arrogant when it comes to how much I accomplish at my young age, and how happy I am to be where I am at the age of twenty. To be honest, I was kind of sad when I turned twenty because I liked the thought of people looking at me and saying “wow, he’s only nineteen and he’s done all that.”
Sounds pretty prideful of me doesn’t, I want recognition for my accomplishments. I don’t think this is why I fill my calendar, but I do think that I gorge in the idea of it when it is full. I really want to learn the art of rest. I find it a lot easier to do in Toronto than I do in Sarnia, but I want to learn how to rest in God. Psalms 46:10 “Be still and know that I am God.” I want to learn how to do that effectively. I want to learn to rest in God.
I’m learning, day by day, and his message tonight just emphasized the fact that I need to more, how to slow down. He talked about the story in Luke 10 about Mary and Martha. How Mary was so distracted by everything that needed to be done when Jesus was with her and Martha simply sat at his feet.
“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed.[f] Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”
I want to choose what is better. I want to do only the things that are needed and not just the things that make me feel better. It’s interesting that on my way home I started thinking about doing things with my life that I have never even pondered before, like spending a few months in Africa working with people with AIDS. We just need to continue to strive for the ultimate balance, something I’ll never completely get, but I’m working on it. Speed was never essential in the life of Christ, yet we’ve made it the pinnacle in our own. God help me slow down.
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”