A Boob Apologetic

So my doctor popped me with a few needles to take some of my lifesource away from me and determined that I had mono. So that could either mean a lot more writing for my website or a lot less. I’m not sure which one yet.

I realize that maybe a select few people will find this crude; I didn’t write it for them, so please if you are offended by talk about boobs, you need to stop reading to save you and myself trauma.

I’m a guy. I don’t know many guys (except those in this revolutionary gay movement) who don’t like breast. Now this may come to a shock too many, maybe females, I’m not sure. But if you don’t believe me just watch T.V. for 5 minutes and ask yourself why every female has either the tightest shirt possible on her or cleavage longer than their strands of hair. I just saw a MAD TV episode last night where every male that had any encounter with this female with large showy breasts was able to do nothing but gawk, and moan and make odd sounds. Even though I’m a Christian and I’m fighting the battle of lust every single day, I can’t deny that I’m attracted to females. I can’t deny that I’m attracted to breasts.

I never really thought about this attraction in depth before. Why am I attracted to boobs? What makes them so desirable? After all, all they are lumps of fatty flesh with nipples (something guys have) on them. In fact some guys pretty much have breasts if they work out long enough and I’m not attracted to them. Why are there thousands of people that flood strip joints almost every night all over Canada? Why when you want to download a movie scene all you can find is a topless scene from that movie on download programs? Why are nude paintings considered to capture the utmost beauty? I decided that there is no logical reason. It can’t be inherited completely. I’m convinced that most males would grow up naturally attracted to females and their breasts with or without boobie influence. It’s not very logical. Fatty tissue? C’mon.

Breasts are one of my apologetics for my God. In other words, I believe in God because of boobs. That might sound heretical to you, it might just sound crude and I might not have had to say it but it’s true. When I think about my desire for that fatty tissue and I try to control it and understand it I realize that it’s not my desire that I created. It was given to me and us by God. It’s something we can learn to bring under the authority of Christ, but it’s not something you can turn off. Only our creator can take two lumps of fatty tissue and make them into the most wonderful pieces of art and make us desire them. Boobs help me believe in God. What are the things in your life that make you realize that only God could grant and gives you unmovable faith that God is involved?

8 thoughts on “A Boob Apologetic”

  1. Its not even that breasts are hot to look at in the nude. It seems as though the invitation is hotter than the party. And its not even the cleavage that does it for me. Some girls show too much and I think it takes away from them. I just love females period.

    There is something that comes over me when a girl that dresses good, not reveling, but well dressed. Even girls in there grubs can find me stunned at how good they look.

    I love how my girlfriend dresses. Can I say that? (Sorry Hun, Im not trying to kiss-up) but shes so attractive. So much more attractive than if she was skimping around in nothing. She doesnt reveal anything and I am just stunned at how she looks.


    Admitably though, when a girl walks my way who is dressed in a reveling way, its hard not to look (and I have read every mans battle and every young mans battle so you think I would be an expert in not looking ha)

    I thank God for women and my attraction to them. There amazing. I love women. And when I am trying to love women in the perspective of loving and honoring them, its even better!

  2. ” 18 May your fountain be blessed,
    and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.

    19 A loving doe, a graceful deer
    may her breasts satisfy you always,
    may you ever be captivated by her love. ” (emphasis mine)- Proverbs 5

    Hey…you knew it was comming! Praise God for Boobies!

  3. Dear Nathan and Ron
    Although we value the fact that you can find beauty in creation and relate truth to the craziest of situations…we personally find it difficult to relate. Maybe it’s cause we’re girls, or maybe it’s cause you guys are on drugs, verdict is still out on that one…However, we started wondering why six packs aren’t mentioned in the Bible…we think it’s because women the heart of the man much more than his muscles (sorry Nathan and Ron, even yours)… We appreciate your honesty, and thanks for being so honest about the realities of being a guy.
    We would also like to remind readers that in no way do the thoughts of these boys directly relate to us. Except when they compliment us, we like that.
    with much like,
    The Rachels

  4. Ron,
    I’m guessing this was a mistake.. and if it wasn’t I think you are the only person I know that feels this way.. cuz I sure don’t! ah.
    “I just love female’s period” .. perhaps you meant “I just love females; period.”. Ha.. funny

    Laura….that’s the funniest thing, i don’t think anyone else caught that.

    but thank-you for makinge laugh out loud in front of my computer screen.

  6. Darryl [also boyfriend of Umm]

    yes. i love that my girl picked that up. Laura you’re the best. oh Ron. what will you come up with next?

  7. Come on, your going to hold my grammar to a comma?

    Well, I guess I would have a problem if my career needed grammar, but it doesnt, so I have to make due with the grade 12 teaching I received at our elite school of St. Clair.

    With the teaching I received there, you should be impressed that I spelt period correctly.

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